Beard Blog

Flashback | Bryan Bowden : Bearded Comedian

2011-01-17T14:02:00.000-08:00

With the eminent return of WORDS THAT KILL this Thursday at creative lounge CHICAGO, in Wicker Park - I thought I would (re)celebrate a comedian that the LP team loves! Click HERE to view the post on my new ChicagoNow blog, BEARD CANDY!

The Great Mundane ! on BEARD CANDY!

2011-01-14T13:10:00.000-08:00

I just wrote an awesome review of a former Chicago musician, The Great Mundane. He currently resides in Portland OR and is on tour. I caught his show at the Empty Bottle a couple of weeks ago...took some sweet photos and just posted my review.

Check it out here at my new blog, BEARD CANDY, on ChicagoNow!

Links
my photography

Is Somebody Embarrassed? Beard Controversy on ChicagoNow.com

2011-01-12T09:00:00.000-08:00

Embarrassed Face - Be careful what you say!

Hello Friends! Read about all of today's Beard Controversies! It's better than People, or Star magazine...it's BEARD CANDY!!!

Read the 2nd post of my new beard blog on Chicago Now!!

Mondays : Classic Flash Backs!

Wednesdays : Beard Controversy!

Friday : Always Entertaining!

The Beard Blog Has Moved To CHICAGONOW.COM!!!

2011-01-10T14:45:00.000-08:00

That's right folks. Your friendly, neighborhood, beard blogger's blog has been picked up by the esteemed CHICAGO NOW website (which is an affiliate of the Chicago Tribune!).

The blog is back, in action, and now ready to TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!! Or...at least...take it to the next level!!

Please join me at http://www.chicagonow.com/beardcandy every monday, wednesday, and friday for all things beardy!

Before I go however, I'd like to thank Dan (the original father of this blog) for welcoming me to be a contributor for 6 months! You're the man, Dan - feel free to send me suggestions or guest-write on my Chicago Now blog anytime!

This has been a warm and loving message brought to you by, Commander Mojdeh.

LINKS
Chicago Now blog, BEARD CANDY

SEND PRESS RELEASES & SUGGESTIONS TO
themojdeh@gmail.com
Please make certian your subject begins "BEARD CANDY: [insert subtext]"

Featured Apparal: Beardy Beanies!

2010-11-24T09:47:00.000-08:00

It's that time of year! I'm here to help you all save your sanity on Black Friday!!! This installment will help you stay put in your home, whilst shopping for things that can only warm the heart, soul, head & lower face! :-)>

I am in love with these winter caps! They wrap right around the face to create a foe-beard throughout the winter! HOW WONDERFUL! The best part, is the little twirly top of the mustache!

I'm ready to go on a little bike ride mid-winter. Don't mind me, I'll just be the beardy lady . . . but you can call me, Moj Beard!

Okay, now that I'm done with my outburst I can tell you all about where you can scoop them up for the holidays!

An estranged young lady whom I have never met, is apparently inspired by the wondrous glory of furry face and has made it her life's calling to sell said Beardy Beanies on her etsy page! So please visit TaraDuff's etsy and support her in her mad science of knitted beard magic

This post has been written for your delight by, Moj Beard!

Links:

Tarra Duff's Etsy Page
Mojdeh's Official Website
Moj Beard, Private Investigator

Don't Get Lost in the Shadow

2010-10-06T12:44:00.000-07:00

Dear Friends,

This friendly blog post is to inform you that I am going to sneak into the 5'oclock shadow of life for a couple of months and return with some great/wonderful adventures of the lost follicles! So for those of you that are already following this feed - keep following. Those that check in 3 times a week - START FOLLOWING! And always feel free to email press releases, comments, questions, etc to themojdeh@gmail.com.

Meanwhile, I will continue to cover beard-related events in Chicago and beyond. I will make special note of anything beardy - that you guys share with me - and post about it all upon my return. Thanks for being such great followers my friends! :)

With Love,
Commander Mojdeh

But for good luck...I leave you with this...

Harry Potter...expressing his magic in full-follicle!

Patience Needed: Man Sad - Woman Happy

2010-10-04T09:15:00.000-07:00

So I've noticed that there's a whole bunch of internet happenings surrounding the sad mis-happenings of pitifully grown beards. Most of these mentions are perpetuated by men that have been coaxed by their ladies to take a stab at "Sexy Scruff", like on this man's blog, but sadly these men are not confident enough in the possibilities of their future "Sexy Scruff" to give it the time it needs to grow in! This man's blog received a lot of entertaining feedback - which was quite split. The men who clearly had beards themselves told him to give it time, and everyone else simply told him there may not be hope, BUT, it was a worthy experiment for the sake of his lady! My favorite comment, posted by user "PMD" reads as follows:

To quote The Quiet Beatle...

"It's gonna take time
A whole lot of precious time
It's gonna take patience and time
To do it,
to do it,
to do it,
to do it,
to do it
To do it right"

And on that note. I'm going to leave you with George Harrison's video of this particular song! Please note the ridiculous nature of his mullet...but the loveliness of his5 o'clock shadow.

George Harrison, rockin his 'stache!

This post has been written for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh.

Links
Scruff is Sexy - Facebook Group
Shia LaBeouf brings back his Sexy Scruff

In honor of the process of beard growth...

2010-10-01T14:12:00.000-07:00

Beard Growth...

Scientist that hopes to be a future astronaut, see astronaut4hire.com

In my investigations of what's-what in the world of beards on You Tube, I have found an interesting trend. There are many men that feel the need to document the growth of thier beards - and though my initial thoughts about this were "how trite" - I'm really facinated by this now. I'm interested in this inclination to document the process. To show the world how long it takes, what it looks like every time it changes. It reminds me of watching science films in my 7th grade Life Science classes. It may not be new...but it's still interesting. So for the sake of celebrating the time that it takes for our men to sport such folicles of glory! I give you my 2 favorite videos of beard growth!

Video 1:

I love this video because the video's subject (Jimmy Greenfield of Red Eye & Chicago Now) is so straight faced, MEANWHILE there's a vast amount of sassy faces that pop up in the background! The entertaining Irish punk song about beards is just the sugar on top!

Video 2:

This video excites me because of the journey that the subject was taking while he was documenting his beard growth. He decided to go on a long distance cycling trip - which I think takes some serious dedication!

This post has been written for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh.

Featured TV Show : LOST

2010-09-24T00:45:00.000-07:00

In my last post, I briefly mentioned LOST when referencing beards-in-television. I know that two posts about TV back-to-back could be viewed as over-kill, but luckily, my last post was not about a TV show - it was about Conan & his beard - more specifically, his beard's power to take over media! Therefore, I am perfectly justified in this over indulgent gesture celebrating ALL OF THE BERDS OF LOST!!!

I could continue building this post all day!

This post has been written for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh!

Media Heads Fear The Beard Take Over Is An Imminent Reality!...it is!

2010-09-22T02:54:00.000-07:00

Fact : middle aged men look best with FULL beards; distinguished - not flashy!

Fact : By now we have all learned that the media is controlled by white middle aged men.

Fact : Conan Obrian has a new show coming out!

Fact : Conan is a white middle aged man! (also a ginger...also lanky)

This may be the first time in contemporary Late Night television history that a host has decided to sport a beard permanently! Therefore having the possibility to completely alter the standard for facial hair across all late night TV hosts. Once the Late Night TV Hosts have beards, then the News Anchors will want beards! Then the morning show men, and all the men of radio (even though we can't see them). Once all the men of radio have beards, then ALL, YES ALL the men of music will be inclined to have beards - therefore (hopefully) altering the standard of what's "sexy" on a broader scale because we all know that musicians set the real standard for what's "cool" and THEN, when having a beard is "cool" we'll see beards in prime time television - and it won't just be a continuity tactic (ie. LOST, etc) it will be REAL!

Beard + Leather = Bad Ass ... CLEARLY!

This is the "Beard Of Glory" pose! He knows!

With a beard like that...why bother paying attention to the dangers of wearing plaid with stripes!?

CLEARLY this ginger / red-beard has the power to make serious change. I suggest we all just let him do what he has to do! Do not stop him! Watch the show...once he has the ratings...the beards will come! And the "Folicual Domination" will begin! [insert world/folical domination music here]

SCENE!

This post has been written for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh!

LINKS

Mojdeh's blog post about red-beards

Mojdeh's 1st blog post about Conan

Conan's official website

PS. If you believe you can or have composed world/folical domination music. Please send your mp3s to themojdeh@gmail.com, subject "BEARD ANTHEHMS."

Featured Dessert: Dragon's Beard

2010-09-20T10:01:00.000-07:00

No beard goes un-noticed on my watch! I recently succumbed to the urge to look at food porn.

definition : food porn [thanks wikipedia]
*a provocative term variously applied to a spectacular visual presentation of cooking or eating in advertisements, infomercials, cooking shows or other visual media.
*"Food porn" specifically refers to food photography and styling that presents food glamorously or provocatively, as in glamour photography or pornographic photography.

In my quest to gaze at delicious delights which I cannot eat due to allergies (i.e. 3 layered chocolate cakes, with a layer of mousse, all covered in ganache, or pan fried grilled cheese sandwiches on sourdough bread...etc) - anywayz - whilst on such a quest I stumbled upon a bearded delight! Dragon's Beard Candy!

I THEN, went on a quest to FIND such a treate and had no success!

So I am raising a challenge to my readers! If one of you fine beard enthusiasts decides to find this delectable delight and tries it --> I will post your review of the desert here; you will be a guest contributor for the day! NOW, if you'd like to take it to the NEXT LEVEL and you decide to learn how to make it, and you send me a video of you making it, there will be a secret prize waiting for you on the other end! [this only applies to the first person to perform each act]

This post has been written for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh.

Links

Chocolate Cake that I shouldn't eat

Grilled Cheese Sandwich I shouldn't eat

Belgian Waffels I shouldn't eat

Beard Shaped Cake ... That I shouldn't eat

SPOT NEWS : Beard Enviest Strikes Again!

2010-09-17T01:51:00.001-07:00

I'm sure many of you have already meditated on the important societal issues that were brought to the surface in my post titled, Sigmund Freud's Under Recognized Theory on BEARD ENVY!

It has been brought to my attention that there has been another sighting of famed Beard Enviest, Sarah Herrmann. She has been spotted with more fabricated facial follicles!

Image found on the alleged Beard Enthusiast's facebook - actually she volunteered the photo! SHOCKING!

Do not be fooled! This is NOT a REAL beard!

This Beard Enviest CLEARLY is in need of some support!

It is official - we must start a neighborhood Beard Watch!

I nominate myself as President!

If you or anyone you know has seen this person, or any other person lurking with "folicles of fabrication" - please be sure to email your poporotzi portraits to themojdeh@gmail.com, subject "BEARD POPOROTZI"!

This post has been written for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh.

Featured Musician : Iron & Wine : The Beard IS BACK in 2011

2010-09-15T01:43:00.000-07:00

It is true! With all male musicians, but music is simply better when it has to voyage through beard BEFORE it gets to the microphone! This is true of all talented men actually, not just musicians! For those of you that don't know, for men, the beard is a sort of filter. For some musicians, they enjoy to perform through a light reverb, delay, or distortion. But for Iron & Wine, his beard acts as a pitch filter, only allowing the softest-most-gentle frequencies to sneak through to the microphone. BRILLIANT!

Sam Beam (aka, Iron & Wine)

He's dropping a new album in 2011 which we should all keep our eyes, ears, and whiskers open to! But until then - please enjoy one of his infamous treats of past by watching this video!

This post has been written for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh.

Links
See article we borrowed photo from

Sigmund Freud's Under-Recognized Theory on BEARD ENVY!

2010-09-13T17:58:00.000-07:00

It seems that everywhere we go, we see signs of Sigmund Feud's always-correct theories of human behavior and sexuality in effect. Most are familiar with his psychosexual theories regarding women looking for men just like thier fathers, men looking for women just like thier mothers, and of course the infamous "penis envy". These topics have been so talked about over the last century that neo-femenist actavists like Karen Horney have even expanded that into theories like "womb envy", etc.

What no one seems to talk about, is a much more serious issue that has been plaguing women for centuries; BEARD ENVY! One of the beard blogs anonymous researchers has been scouring social media websites (ie. facebook, etc) for examples of women who clearly have said envy.

Sarah Herrmann, 2 time offender of facial hair impersonation!

The Beard Envy is so deep with this one, she even impersonated a uni-brow.


Jesse M (left), Mojdeh (right), circa 2005, it's true, Recovering Beard Enviests.				We've been Beard-Envy-Sober for 5 years!

This is only SOME of the shocking truth that our researcher found on the facebook. If you would like to submit any documentation of ladies with Beard Envy, please send an email to themojdeh@gmail.com, subject "BEARD BLOG".

This post has been written for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh.

Links
Why Advertising Sucks Blog - Beard Envy post
Beard Envy as result of no facial hair, only neck beard

Featured Apparel: They Grow On You!

2010-09-10T17:27:00.000-07:00

While surfing zazzle.com looking for something COMPLETELY UN BEARD RELATED (i swear!), I stumbled upon this delight!

I have a soft spot for humor that's just a touch punny! And the best part is that the shirts being modeled by a bonified beard!

You can buy this shirt by clicking here!

This post has been written for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh.

Featured Video: If Your Dad Doesn't Have a Beard, You've Got Two Mums

2010-09-08T05:11:00.000-07:00

Despite my recent frustrations with youtube. It appears that I have reconciled my issues with youtube ... for now! And to show my appreciation of my ability to share ridiculous beardy-videos with the world. Here's a taste of THE BEARDS, a band from Australia!

This post has been brought to you for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh.

Links
THE BEARDS official myspace page

TAKING IT TO THE NEXT LEVEL! Advances in processed foods invigorate folical creators! Is this the end of the Rogain Era?

2010-09-06T15:15:00.000-07:00

So I recently watched the new Willie Wonka & The Chocolate Factory while I was babysitting a friend's 4 year old. During the invention room sequence Willie introduces this "hair toffee" and says "You suck down one of these...and a brand new crop of hair will start growing out of all over your little noggin, and a mustache, and a beard..." and then one of the kids says "who want's a beard?" Willie replies, "...beatnicks for one..." and I just started laughing!

So, this was supposed to be a ridiculous post about a "mysterious scientist" that developed a candy that can grow hair. I was intending on embedding a streaming selection of the "documentary" that I had viewed about said candy...but I was having so many technical difficulties that instead this has become a story about not being able to post this post as it was originally intended! This post has been taken TO THE NEXT LEVEL!

My post was supposed to read as follows:
"For two decades lotions, shampoos, and compounds like Rogain have been many men's solotions to loss of hair. Other men choose to pay top dollar for hair implants! But luckily, one of the UK's most well recognized scientific innovators, William Wonka, has created a tiny, yet delicious solution to this problem, Hair Toffee!

CLICK HERE TO VIEW VIDEO ABOUT "HAIR TOFFEE"

Except, where the link is, I wanted to embed the video - I think media content is more interesting with some kind of visual aid AND the post looses it's humor w/o the video clip. Simple business, right? Well, if you navigate to the youtube page, and click the "embed" button you will notice that a prompt pops up where the html code should be! "Embedding disabled by request" So being the resourcefull blogger that I am, I thought, no biggie. I used one of those youtube ripping softwares and saved the video to my laptop. I then logged into my own youtube and uploaded the video freshly - thinking, I could then embed the video from my page. ALAS, youtube must've built some kind of algorythm searching for videos with like information - the video was auto-blocked from being embedable, just seconds after posting it!! I tried re-loading it with a different file name, etc etc, three atempts later - I gave up on youtube.

NEXT I thought, well, let me just rip the audio and I'll post it utilizing an audio streaming service, but every audio streamer I tried to load on my computer won't recognize the audio file! DAMN! So FINALLY I decided that I would just post a link (as you saw before) and post screen shots of the scene in the invention room. BUT MY BEARD BLOG WON'T READ THE SCREEN SHOTS!!!! AHHHHH! So alas...here I am...no streaming video...no streaming audio...and no screen shots! But that didn't stop me from beard-blogging!

No worries, nothing will ever stop me from beard blogging!

This post has been written for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh!

Links
Gripes About YouTube
Mojdeh's Star Trek Blog

Man's Best Affectation? Doctor from the future reviels the truth behind the beard while playing a leisure game of poker!

2010-09-03T15:05:00.000-07:00

Beverly Crusher is the future's most well respected medical practicianer. You may remember her from such "future history" programs like, Star Trek the Next Generation! She is not convinced that the beard is a necessity! But clearly the men of the future disagree! Frankly, so do I!

This post has been brought to you for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh.

Links
Synopsis of "The Quality of Life" STNG episode
My Star Trek Blog

Beard Fraud : Some Things Just Need To Surface Before The Truth Comes Out!

2010-09-01T10:37:00.000-07:00

this image was strategically stolen from lefthandedtoons.com

This post has been shared for your pleasure by, Commander Mojdeh.

Links
My Star Trek Blog
My Facebook
My Business
My Band

Man decides to save the world with the most "well" designed "facial" hair on Earth! AKA: The reason why men should consult thier women before ruining thier faces!

2010-08-25T23:20:00.000-07:00

PARENTAL ADVISORY : Viewing this post may perminently damage the eyes of children, young adults, and elderly that have a low tolerence for the stupid things people do to thier bodies in the name of "body art".

oh the things we post on the internet!

This post has been written for your pleasure by, Commander Mojdeh.

Speaking of "Flavor Savors"

2010-08-23T23:02:00.000-07:00

Hello Friends! If you recall, I just shared some pretty sweet "flavor savers" (pun intended), in my last post! But our good friends at the worlds most compitent and reliable news source, The Onion, have shared a very shocking article. I just read this for the first time today, and felt it needed a little additional viral/social networking push. Friends, this is IMPORTANT news!

Special Report:

Man With Food In Beard Saying Something About Climate Change

GENEVA—A man with a piece of food stuck in his beard is currently addressing an auditorium full of world leaders and prominent scholars on what seems to be the subject of global warming, sources are reporting. The food particle has been dangling from the man's facial hair for more than an hour while he has mentioned such phrases as "sulfides," "ice caps," "immediately, otherwise we all may," "underwater tomb," and "of human life as we know it." It was briefly dislodged during a particularly animated portion of the presentation in which complete global apocalypse was remarked upon, only to fall one inch and reattach to a lower portion of beard. The exact nature of the crumb has yet to be ascertained. Some are speculating that it is aioli. Others, however, believe it to be a bit of chewed-up turkey.

To see this article in it's original context please click here!

Flavor Savors : Where food and facial hair collide!

2010-08-20T22:45:00.000-07:00

Now I know a good blog when I see one! Now whilst the "Food Beard" blog is far less diverse than my own, how can one beard blogger (myself) not pay respects to other beard bloggers (mystery people called EG + AK). Here are some of my favorite flavor savors!


I think Mel "The Melon" Gibson is looking quite good today!

Chris Pine-apple, and Chris Pine-nuts! Ahahahahahahahaha!

And while that was quite entertaining, my personal favorite is Sarah Palin's Hunting Beard (below)

There's a little meat left for later - you know, midnight snack!

Links
The Food Beard Blog
Mel Gibson - Wikipedia
Chris Pine - Wikipedia
Sarah Palin - The Onion

KT & AMANDA'S AMAZING FO'STACHES!

2010-08-18T01:48:00.000-07:00

KT (left), Amanda (right)

Somehow I missed a mustache party that my best friend and her sister had! This is quite possibly my favorite picture of these two ladies...EVER!! I have to admit, as much as I love my dear friend Amanda, her younger sister does wear that 'stache with way more enthusiasm!!!

Featured Event: Encyclopedia Show (Chicago)

2010-08-16T07:24:00.000-07:00

[Shanney Jean & Robbie Q, pictured left at the Ecnyclopedia Show - pictured without beards...]

As an active member of the Chicago poetry scene, I often find myself at many poetry shows in the city. One of my favorite shows is the Encyclopedia Show, produced by Robby Q Telfer & Shanny Jean Maney. This is a poetry heavy variety show where they pick a different theme for each show, and then assign topics to each performer to develope a performance around.

They welcomed me to perform during thier season finale, Season 2: Volume 10: The Circus. When it was announced that I would be participating in "The Circus" I thought for SURE they were going to assign "bearded lady" to me! In fact, I started developing performance ideas on my way from the show where it was announced! Alas, I was wrong. They assigned Gibsonton, Florida to me. A place famous for being a wintering town for circus people, the only place in the USA with laws allowing you to keep your pet elephant in your front lawn if you want to!

Upon recieving my assignment I started devloping a half song, half poem, that I was only half excited about. A week before the event, a certain bearded comedian, Bryan Bowden (see earlier post about Bryan) left me a facebook message informing me that he had made the suggestion for Gibsonton as a topic because there had been an X-Files episode that took place in that town. So as a former X-Files addict I decided to do some research and proptly streamed the episde on Netflix! By the time I was done with the episode, I realized that Gibsonton was famous for several murders, and I had a new viggor for my topic. I tucked myself away to re-write my performance, except THIS TIME, I was writing a Neo-Noir voice over as "Moj Beard, Private Investigator" (Gibsonton's, bearded lady P.I.). I slaved over developing the monologue for days and then at 10am the morning of the Encyclopedia Show, I recorded my voice over, laid all the appropriate music / sound fx, and found all of the appropriate props/costuming I could pull together - all with exactly 20min to spare before I had to check in for the show!

Click here to listen to the result! I had a brown trench coat, brimmed hat, brief case, fake wiskey, shot glass, suspenders, a prop gun, and files that said things like "Geek Murders" and a newspaper with articles like "Lobster Boy Gets Away With Murder"!

I shared the stage with performers that I adore like, Roger Bonair-Agard and George Decibelle - Needless to say, Encyclopedia Show "The Circus" was nothing less than a freak show!

Do check check out the Encyclopedia Show's official website because their "Anthology Show" is coming up, with highlight performances from the last season as a teaser for the start of season 3 of T.E.S.

Links:
Chicago Public Radio's Preview of the Event
The Encyclopedia Show's official website
Moj Beard / Gibsonton FL Noir Audio
My Official Website
My Production Company

Bearded For Your Pleasure!

2010-08-13T12:53:00.000-07:00

I think this left-handed cartoon speaks for itself!

Anti-Shave / Pro Baseball Player PSA

2010-08-06T05:49:00.000-07:00

I have a tendency of being entertained by really lo-fi flash animated videos. And today, I'm not sure how . . . but I found myself at beardoftruth.com - and before I had a chance to navagate away . . . the BEARD STARTS TALKING! I'm going to go ahead and vote this website into the "entertaining" department - even though I may never be impulsed to watch it again (unlike other flash videos like: TISM video & End of The World animation). So alas, I hope you all get a mini-giggle out of it as much as I did.

The Internet Is Filled With Strange Beards!

2010-08-04T09:59:00.000-07:00

I have to admit, an adult that was THIS beard equip at such a young age is PROBABLY a little too bearded as an adult. OR this is one VERY SKILLED beard sculptor by the time he's a grown adult.

This post has been written for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh.

"Grow It Back, Damnit" Selection : Connan O'Brian

2010-08-02T09:53:00.000-07:00

ALSO, Connan, it's okay to hug the monkey back! He clearly loves you!

For the love of beards! This is an unreasonable woman!

2010-07-30T21:41:00.000-07:00

A woman who puts this much "sing-song" into trying to get her man to shave his beard is clearly a little batty! I could understand encouraging him to grow a fuller beard, possibly a goatee, but really, SHAVE IT ALL! The man would suddenly look like a boy . . . look at his porcelain baby face! Not worth it!

This post has been written for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh!

MY DREAM COME TRUE? . . . almost . . .

2010-07-28T00:23:00.000-07:00

So anyone that knows me particularly well knows that I have a bit of a soft spot for Red-Beards! Let me explain . . .

+ =

TRANSLATION: red beard + mojdeh = very very beautiful mixed children

Note: child pictured above has no relation to me! it's just a photo of a half ginger, half af-am child that I found via Google image search.

So when I stumbled upon a link called "Red-Beard Game" I became a tiny bit excited, but wasn't certain exactly what kind of "game" could involve a Red-Beard! Unfortunately for me, this was not a dating game for prospects in search of their dream ginger! Instead it was a quirky and adorable flash animated game where a tiny little man is trying very hard to get to gold treasure!

This post has been written for your delight by, the future, Mrs. Red Beard!

Links:

The Red Beard Game

Featured Poet: John Paul Davis

2010-07-26T04:11:00.000-07:00

For all that understand the necessity to create art about the things that are most important in life, I present, John Paul Davis! He is an accomplished poet, designer, and the editor-in-chief of Bestiary Magazine (an innovative new literary magazine)! He recently returned to Chicago to accept a residency with Vox Ferus (a poetry performance, workshop, & writing non-profit). Since his return he's become the WORDS THAT KILL Slam Master, started a new magazine, and will represent the Mental Graffiti slam team at the 2010 National Poetry Slam! My hat goes of to you, oh bearded poet and talented peer!

Here's his poem "Ode To My Beard" as performed at the 2010 Green Mill semi-finals!

This post has been written for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh!

Links:
John Paul Davis personal website
Bestiary Magazine official website
Lethal Poetry's WORDS THAT KILL series
Poetry Slam Inc official website

THE ROOTS MAKE MUSIC : The Roots are fans of BEARDS! (as it should be)

2010-07-23T00:59:00.000-07:00

According to our reliable sources at http://beardedgentleman.com it appears the author's of The Bearded Gentleman (book) had a run-in with acclaimed hip hop artists, ?uestlove and Black Thought of The Roots! At this strange encounter, it was brought to the authors' attention that these were two men who stand behind their beards with every follicle of confidence and celebration!

Now it is apparent that facial hair is a common staple in the hip hop world - however, unfortunately it often manifests in the form of what I like to call a "chin strap," a thin outline of the jaw line from side burn to side burn - it's not good!

Alas, I applaud Mr. ?uestlove & Black Thought for not attempting to bastardize the facial fuzz that God hath provided them!

Please click here if you'd like to see the source article about these beard enthusiastic musicians!

This article has been written for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh!

Featured Ad: Old Spice "Mustache Man"

2010-07-21T00:41:00.000-07:00

I am oh so very entertained by this Old Spice ad. I think this family of ads that Old Spice has released are actually incredibly effective because it's over the top in "serious" but they are explicitly ridiculous about said "seriousness"! Please enjoy this Mustachiod spokesman for everyone's favorite rugged scent!

Delightful! Isn't it!? . . . Well I'm assuming you said yes.
SO! If that video was a treat, here's another entertaining Old Spice ad...just for good measure!

This post has been written for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh!

Links:
Old Spice official website
Old Spice You Tube Channel
My Star Trek Blog
My official website
My business's official website
My band's official website

Featured YouTube: Growing A Beard By Sheer Willpower

2010-07-19T03:45:00.000-07:00

If one were to voyage to youtube as I have, searching for entertainment you might find that there are a million time lapsed videos of men who've documented the growth of their beard by way of taking a picture every day and editing it all together. However...if you look further - beyond the iMovie simple slide shows...you will find this little gem!

This post has been written for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh!

Featured Song: Sophie Madeleine's "Beard Song"

2010-07-16T00:38:00.000-07:00

This is a delightful little treat that is sure to set the mood for an amazing weekend! I stumbled upon this song, much in the same way I stumbled upon this blog before I was the primary contributor! ENJOY!

This post has been written for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh!

Links:
More Rediculous Music : "I Want Your DNA" by, Vynl Mo

Featured Books : One Thousand Beards & The Bearded Gentlemen (preview)

2010-07-14T11:00:00.000-07:00

I was turned onto the Art Of Manliness website recently and even made a post about it last week. In my further exploration of this amazing website I found a podcast interview with the author of "One Thousand Beards" and "The Bearded Gentleman", two books focused on facial hair culture.

One Thousand Beards, appears to be a historical commentary on beards from the caveman's era all the way to now! Tracing the history of things like the razor; back-in-the-day cave men figured out how to use clam shells to pluck their beards and over the centuries developed it to straight razors, and then multi-blade razors, and electric razors, etc. This book heavily considers religious, political, and economic influences upon the beard over the ages and even speaks of a time when men would be taxed for having a beard (a sign of wealth). This podcast interview on the artofmanliness.com was very informative but more so endeared the author to me (one more Canadian to love!).

The Bearded Gentleman, appears to be more of a how-to in beard preparation, maintenance, shaping, etc etc. It has also become a running blog since these books have been released, so check that out as well!

Both seem like worthy books to own if your are a beard fanatic!

This post has been written for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh!

Links
Art of Manliness - website
Art of Manliness - Book Preview - podcast
The Commander Mojdeh Portal
Something Lethal

Featured Comedian: Bryan Bowden

2010-07-12T11:55:00.000-07:00

THIS JUST IN: Due to popular demand (no, I'm totally serious, there's demand for this blog - who knew?!) I will now be posting every Monday, Wednesday, & Friday to fill your souls with beardy goodness! All that being said . . .

I'm sure most of you think that I spend every waking hour searching the world and the internet for fine examples of bearded excellence (and I do) but I'm a multi-tasker dammit! So at the monthly poetry & comedy showcase that I produce - you can be sure that I'll find a way to curate a few good beards into the mix!

Bryan Bowden, is one of the funniest beards in Chicago! In fact, he's even required to have a beard as a part of a show called "Impress These Apes," where he, of course performs as an ape! Naturally, I approve of the show!

[Photo credit: Lethal Poetry Staff Photographer, Lauren Herrmann]

Take a listen to this clip of his performance at Lethal Poetry's Words That Kill series in May, as he explains how the Australian gov't made a special request to utilize a photograph of him with a handlebar mustache that they found on his flickr page!! [Audio credit: Fyodor Sakhnovski - vocalo.org]

[Photo care of Bryan]

This post has been written for your enjoyment by, Commander Mojdeh!

Links:
Listen to Bryan Bowden's Audio Clip
Blewt Productions - Impress These Apes
Lethal Poetry Productions
Words That Kill series

Breaking News: Serious Crime In Humboldt Park, BUT WHERE ARE ALL THE COP 'STACHES?

2010-07-10T01:51:00.000-07:00

It's 4:32am right now - Earlier I heard some noises which I wrote off as being fire crackers. I distinctly remember thinking to myself "I hate fire crackers - they make me feel as if there are guns going off in my neighborhood. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not a fool, but it's July 10th when I'm thinking this, at 1am and you can be damn sure there are STILL kids setting off their tiny rockets & fire crackers as if the 4th ends when they want it to end.

About 25-40 mins pass and I hear my friend Fyodor say, "They're arresting some guy!" - Okay, now my interest is peaked. I stand up & start peering in the direction of the of badge toting dudes piled upon one poor sucker that's getting hand cuffed. It took several minutes to cuff him and get him tucked into a car - and all I could think was, "How many cops does it take to fasten some hand cuffs...count...1, 2, 3, 4, 5!..." AMAZING!

By the time Mr. Criminal had been tucked away into a vehicle to take to lock-up, I'd gathered the binoculars and I'm watching hard-core like this is an episode of 24! ::insert beeping clock here::

I completely understand that I was being sucked into the event that was happening outside as if it was spectacle - but in many ways it was just that!

They put police tape up to section off 1/4 of the entire block - there were at least 15 to 20 officers, several of which were specialized detectives, k-9 units, & sheriffs. I saw one officer put a large bag of white powdery substance in a specially marked bag into the trunk of her squad car, another cop walked away from the taped-off area with an automatic riffle, and an officer broke into a car to hotwire it and confiscate it!!

Okay, so all this being said, we can pretty much assume that there was violence & drugs involved in whatever happened! But in the middle of trying to figure out what was going on...I noticed something very odd! THERE WERE NO COP 'STACHES!?

According to the Positive Law Enforcement Blog, Department spokesman Sgt. Rick Mincy of the Chattanooga Police said, “When I think of a police officer, I think of a guy with a mustache!” - So clearly, something's changed in Chicago! The blog later continues with an average Chattanooga police officer being quite matter-of-fact about his facial hair, “I wear it here,” said Sgt. Tommy Meeks, pointing to his lip, “because I don’t have any here,” he continued, gesturing toward a balding scalp.

OKAY, so the two cops nearest me were 2 of 3 officers with face-fuzz. One with a fully seasoned salt & pepper beard trimmed at least a inch and a half from the face and pretty groomed. His partner on the other hand had a wild walrus mustache (like this gentleman that's pictured here)! And the third fuzzy faced detective had a white-man's-chin-strap (a little thicker than the hip-hop-standard-chin-strap). But that's it! That's all we get!

I tried to video tape what was happening, but the street lights were all in the wrong places. I was one step away from stepping outside and approaching Cop Beardy & his partner Detective Walrus 'Stache, when I decided that my inquiries may distract from the issues at hand. BUT SERIOUSLY, Dist. 14, what's with your lack of cop-staches!!??

It appears Dist 14 (serving Humboldt Park & Wicker Park - Chicago) is filled with Caucasian and Latino dudes that love their military hair cuts, big muscles, and bullet proof vests! I caught just a couple of Donout Storage Units (round cops), but they were clearly the higher ups - finally rolling out of the office to find out what's going on in the real world again!

These observations sparked an entire dialog between Fyodor, Lauren and myself. Lauren was hoping I'd go outside and address Cop Beardy, to try to get down to the bottom of the 'stache shift with the west side PD - and Fyodor was way too concerned with the idea of the police being frustrated with my bothering them to begin with - by the time I decided to take action, the large K-9 van, and 4 of the squads had disappeared; most tragically Cop Beardy & Walrus 'Stache!

So now, I feel that I have to make up for my hesitation! I believe this blog marks the begining of a serious investigation of the police and their internal psychology! I must understand why these west side Chicago Police Officers have walked away from a standard of facial-fuzz that's been with the force consistently since the 70's! I must get to the follical of this situation! I must know - where the 'stache has gone - and whether it's on the verge of making a come back!

This post has been written for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh!

Links:
2nd Annual Cop-Stache Contest
Positive Law Enforcement Blog -article sited here
Stachist.com - cop stach post
NBC Chicago's Coverage of Blackhawks' Coach's Cop-Stache

Featured "Sleaze-Beard": George Michael

2010-07-08T16:51:00.000-07:00

I fear that sometimes . . . facial hair can be used for evil! I think George Michael has proven this!

Clearly, he shaved in a little too close on the bottom edges!
But it gets better . . .

"Reverse-Landing-Strip Soul Patch"?
Awkward!

Ladies & Gentlemen, we call this the
"Fu-Man-Landing-Strip"

This post has been written for your enjoyment by, Commander Mojdeh.

Links
Definition of Sleazy

If you MUST shave! Do it like they do in 19th century war time!

2010-07-07T14:02:00.001-07:00

So a friend of mine randomly sends me a link to a website called "The Art Of Manliness" not so much because she wanted me to scope out some articles about furry men (though I found some!); but because she's in love with anyone that has an appreciation for things that are slightly old-timey. The primary contributors to artofmanliness.com all seem to call upon research and traditions of men from 1950's and earlier - which is very interesting. In many ways, it's as if men circa 1960 and after are no longer manly.

Nevertheless, I became very sucked into this website and found myself reading article after article from; An Article Guaranteed to Put Hair on Your Chest, to an article about COLD WATER SHAVING!

Now I know what you're thinking, "Moj, I don't understand why you're informing Men on how to shave if you want them to be bearded!" but alas - not ALL men can grow beautiful beards, and not all men should have full beards! So if you MUST shave - I think you might enjoy this article on cold water shaving. Take a lesson from some men that are VERY SERIOUS about the ART OF MANLINESS!

This post has been written for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh!

Links:
Art of Manliness - Cold Water Shaving - article
Art of Manliness - Chest Hair - article
My Star Trek / Space Blog
My Production Company
My Band

Featured Blog : Awkward Family Pet Photos

2010-06-23T10:25:00.000-07:00

Chairman of the Beard!

I don't think there's much that can be said about this image. Really, I think it speaks for itself!

To see more winning selections from the awkward family pet photos blog or view this image in it's original context, click here.

This post has been written for your delight by, Commander Mojdeh!

Featured Artist : Marc Johns

2010-06-13T16:33:00.001-07:00

Mr. Marc Johns creates whimsical drawings filled with a delightful amount of dry wit, sass, and humor. But more importantly he playfully incorporates facial fuzz as a part of his illustrations. These are my favorites!

Click here to visit his official website!

-
This post has been written for your delight, by Commander Mojdeh!

Second in Command of The USS Beardy

2010-06-12T19:41:00.001-07:00

~Hello All~

As you may know, Dan (aka: Georgia Des) retired this blog on Sept 2009 because school, life, faith, etc - were all very important at the time (and still remain as such).

Now, a few days ago I stumbled upon this delightful blog after google searching "foxy beard" in a random fit of incoherent boredom and this delightful little gem popped up!

I was excited for two reasons...it is true, most people that know me, know that I am delighted by all boys with beards (inclusive of mutton chops - cuz I'm no a hater), BUT also notice Dan's "RIP Beardy Blog" post's headstone image was of Evil Spock (the beard distinguishes him as such) - AND ALL PEOPLE THAT KNOW ME, know that I'm a massive trekkie (hence my tng blog).

Clearly the beard+trek combo certainly made my day complete! So I did what any sensible beard fanatic would do, went to my other blog and blogged about his blog. THEN, I emailed a stranger (Dan) and asked if I could continue the tradition he began in the art of beard appreciation!

Clearly he said "Yes" :-)

So allow me to humbly introduce myself...

Hi . . . my name is Mojdeh . . . I am a beard addict
[your line : welcome Mojdeh]

I'm a business owner, visual artist, live performer, space geek, and beard fanatic!
Act Like Ya Know :-)>

Series of Unfortunate Events

2009-09-14T16:01:00.000-07:00

Unfortunately, it has become quite difficult to maintain a daily blog about beards. School has started, life is busy, and beards are, apparently, scarce. So, I will be discontinuing this blog and will be posting beards a little less often (but not too less often) on my other neglected blog, Here. See you there!

Featured Artist: Glen Hansard

2009-08-08T11:10:00.000-07:00

"Once" star and member of the amazing band
The Swell Season. His talent
surpasses that of most and
he also has worn the classically dirty
beard for quite some time.
Thank you Glen....for everything.

Featured Friend: Director's Cut

2009-07-29T12:29:00.001-07:00

This is my brother-in-law Nathan.
He has a well kept beard that resembles that
of most directors, which is appropriate
because he is not only a lover, but also a student,
of film. He also kept his beard for his wedding
which is completely awesome.
He really likes thumbs and apple jacks.
Check out his website Here

Featured Friend: Herr Unterkofler

2009-07-20T10:59:00.000-07:00

This is Danny. His beard has had a
long journey, but has reached
its apex just prior to him being married.
(Only 11 more days my friend)
A coincidence?...I think not.
Danny has always carried classic manly
attributes, and what better to top that off,
than a glorious beard.

Quote of the Week: Keira Knightley

2009-07-16T11:38:00.000-07:00

"I'm doing a film now with
a lot of guys as well,
so at the end of that
I will be growing a beard."

Featured Artist: Robin Pecknold

2009-07-15T18:14:00.000-07:00

Robin Pecknold of Fleet Foxes.

Pulling of that dirty-but-not look
Oh so well.

Sightings: @ REI

2009-07-13T11:00:00.000-07:00

This is Blake. I got the chance to meet him last Saturday
after spotting him in an REI parking lot.
We had a nice little chat and
I learned that Blake is a cook. He
went to culinary school up in Portland (great city).
Thanks for the conversation Blake,
and I'm sure the dishes you make
are just as great as your beard.

Featured Friend: Classic Coolness

2009-07-10T11:00:00.000-07:00

This is Mitch. He has had a beard for
almost as long as I have known him.
He has not only grown his beard to its full
glory, but pulls it off with classic American style.
Stop in and say hi to Mitch over at BTNC in
downtown Fullerton.

Quote of the Week: Orson Welles

2009-07-09T12:27:00.000-07:00

"I have the terrible feeling that, because I am wearing
a white beard and am sitting in the back of the theatre,
you expect me to tell you the truth about something.
These are the cheap seats, not Mount Sinai."

Featured Artist: David Crowder

2009-07-03T15:29:00.000-07:00

David Crowder has a classically dirty beard.
For being a skinny white guy from Texas,
He's got a lot of umph in his beard.
His music is wonderful and Crowder is
truly a gentleman.
His Myspace and Website

Featured Friend: The Mountain Man

2009-07-03T00:18:00.001-07:00

I have few friends that can pull off a beard and
make it look as good as Cody does.
He can do the scruff, indie beard, scraggly,
and, of course, the mountain man.
He takes full control of all possible uses of his beard
And makes them all look good.
Way to be a great friend with a great beard!

Moustache of the Month: Casey

2009-07-03T00:14:00.001-07:00

I spotted Casey on Main Street at Disneyland
last Friday night.
He was kind enough to stop a second and pose
for a picture.
Thanks for keeping the moustache classy Casey!
(I hope I'm spelling your name right)

Sightings: In The Terminal

2009-06-28T23:10:00.000-07:00

The plethora of Jewish people in LA
Provides a plethora of Beards at LAX.
Such was the case today.
This guy was the coolest,
but I didn't get a chance to get his name.
Grow Strong buddy.

Quote of the Week: Bill Walton

2009-06-26T11:07:00.000-07:00

"But you have to understand, my beard is so nasty.
I mean, it's the only beard in the history of Western civilization
that makes Bob Dylan's beard look good."

Featured Friend: The Barista Beard

2009-06-25T10:24:00.001-07:00

This is Paul. He works at the Local Starbucks
and is a great conversationalist.
I'm pretty sure his beard is thicker than the
hair on top of his head
which = greatness.
Thanks for being a great friend
with a great beard

William Fitzsimmons

2009-06-24T10:41:00.000-07:00

An Ultimate beard,
an Ultimate Musician.
His Web Site
&
MySpace

Our Founder

2009-06-24T10:34:00.000-07:00

Not Really, but truly, an Inspiration

Beard Blog

Flashback | Bryan Bowden : Bearded Comedian

The Great Mundane ! on BEARD CANDY!

Is Somebody Embarrassed? Beard Controversy on ChicagoNow.com

The Beard Blog Has Moved To CHICAGONOW.COM!!!

Featured Apparal: Beardy Beanies!

Don't Get Lost in the Shadow

Patience Needed: Man Sad - Woman Happy

In honor of the process of beard growth...

Featured TV Show : LOST

Media Heads Fear The Beard Take Over Is An Imminent Reality!...it is!

Featured Dessert: Dragon's Beard

SPOT NEWS : Beard Enviest Strikes Again!

Featured Musician : Iron & Wine : The Beard IS BACK in 2011

Sigmund Freud's Under-Recognized Theory on BEARD ENVY!

Featured Apparel: They Grow On You!

Featured Video: If Your Dad Doesn't Have a Beard, You've Got Two Mums

TAKING IT TO THE NEXT LEVEL! Advances in processed foods invigorate folical creators! Is this the end of the Rogain Era?

Man's Best Affectation? Doctor from the future reviels the truth behind the beard while playing a leisure game of poker!

Beard Fraud : Some Things Just Need To Surface Before The Truth Comes Out!

Man decides to save the world with the most "well" designed "facial" hair on Earth! AKA: The reason why men should consult thier women before ruining thier faces!

Speaking of "Flavor Savors"

Man With Food In Beard Saying Something About Climate Change

Related Articles

Flavor Savors : Where food and facial hair collide!

KT & AMANDA'S AMAZING FO'STACHES!

Featured Event: Encyclopedia Show (Chicago)

Bearded For Your Pleasure!

Anti-Shave / Pro Baseball Player PSA

The Internet Is Filled With Strange Beards!

"Grow It Back, Damnit" Selection : Connan O'Brian

For the love of beards! This is an unreasonable woman!

MY DREAM COME TRUE? . . . almost . . .

Featured Poet: John Paul Davis

THE ROOTS MAKE MUSIC : The Roots are fans of BEARDS! (as it should be)

Featured Ad: Old Spice "Mustache Man"

Featured YouTube: Growing A Beard By Sheer Willpower

Featured Song: Sophie Madeleine's "Beard Song"

Featured Books : One Thousand Beards & The Bearded Gentlemen (preview)

Featured Comedian: Bryan Bowden

Breaking News: Serious Crime In Humboldt Park, BUT WHERE ARE ALL THE COP 'STACHES?

Featured "Sleaze-Beard": George Michael

If you MUST shave! Do it like they do in 19th century war time!

Featured Blog : Awkward Family Pet Photos

Featured Artist : Marc Johns

Second in Command of The USS Beardy

Series of Unfortunate Events

Featured Artist: Glen Hansard

Featured Friend: Director's Cut

Featured Friend: Herr Unterkofler

Quote of the Week: Keira Knightley

Featured Artist: Robin Pecknold

Sightings: @ REI

Featured Friend: Classic Coolness

Quote of the Week: Orson Welles

Featured Artist: David Crowder

Featured Friend: The Mountain Man

Moustache of the Month: Casey

Sightings: In The Terminal

Quote of the Week: Bill Walton

Featured Friend: The Barista Beard

William Fitzsimmons

Our Founder